You're more powerful than you know

The mind is more powerful than we know.

I'm glad God makes people learn the hard way. Because then, they would have experienced first hand what it really feels like. There, understanding is found. It speaks out louder and clearer.

And then, there's no escaping or running away.

It's confrontation, straight up. You turn and you try to hide, but there's no other way to go but, one path. I'm thankful, it's God's path.

I've had to succumb to reading in order to fall asleep over the past few days. Not because I wasn't physically tired - Trust me on this, I was. God was stirring things in my mind, not for the sake of it but because I had a lot to learn.

I was forced to face up, to come clean and to bare myself before God, and myself.

"We need to run for our lives, even when the rest of the world tells us to stop."
- Joyce Meyer

How could I reject that? I've been incredibly worried about growing up, about turning 18 and about what my future's going to look like. But I'm going to have to hold my breath and accept it because it's going to come anyway. There's no way I can stop it.

I've to admit; I've been running, trying to find different means to escape, but I find myself back at where I started. I can't understand why God led me through an entire series of events, but I understand why He made me run.

Here's why:
"No matter how you feel, you must go on because you are the only one who can run your race. Nobody can cross the finish line of your race but you." - Joyce Meyer

I found my answers in the book that I read over the past few nights I was kept awake, thinking. And the title of the book's: I Dare You. (Embrace Life With Passion)

The words strike me so hard, that; I don't know.

God really has His way. Then He leaves my mind light, and empty. What came to mind was what Joachim told me when he gave me this book for my birthday - I need a new challenge in my life. At that time, I wondered, had I not gone through enough of challenges?

Now I know, I haven't. I realised that we're more powerful than we know, but God is powerful beyond measure. Beyond our minds, thoughts and desires - He's greater than we are. And that leaves me in surrender.

Once again, God, You win. You always do and I know You always will. So, here's my future, my mind, my heart, my actions and everything I've failed to surface. Sorry that You've to spend so much time on me, helping me grow up and watching me go round and round. But I also want to say Thank You, because You love me anyway. You love me for, me. That acceptance and love, is more than enough to bring me through, anything. It's priceless.

Let's not get caught in the complex nature of who we are. The more we struggle for life, the more we'll find ourselves trapped. Though I'm scared and hesitant, I've stopped struggling. And guess what, I'm still breathing :)